Sunday, April 3, 2011

When Kids Act Like Kids: Shocking Travesty or Just Life, Dude?

I didn't used to like kids.  Or I didn't think I did.  I didn't get them, so I just wasn't sure.  And, of course, we all have these ideals of how kids should be or families should look, ad nauseam.  I'm the youngest in my family and didn't really have much opportunity to understand little ones.  I used to steer waaaaay clear of them, all due to ignorance and probably no small dose of selfishness.  And then there's the worst offense ever:  The giving of the opinion on other people's children when I'd not had children of my own, and certainly no experience with that family's circumstances (never to their faces; is that better or worse?).  Nice.  How obnoxious I was.  So I do get it when people are uncomfortable around them.  Totally.  What I don't get is people who don't try to even pretend some semblance of kindness or, worse, people who are blatantly snobbish and rude.  That does not bode well with Mrs. Finley, not one trifle.

My apostle at church has said that when his son was little, he always took note of how people would treat his boy.  He said you can often tell a lot about a person by how they treat little kids.  I couldn't agree more.  Fortunately, even in my obnoxious, single, kidless, and kid-phobic days, I was still kind to them to the degree that I knew how.  So I passed his test.  Just barely, I presume.  But I totally get it now.  I'm so aware of how people treat not just my kids, but children, even the lively, willful ones (are there any who aren't?).

To wax philosophical, as I'm prone to do, the next generation is a treasure trove of possibility and potential and beautiful strength.  We must sow as much as we can into them: as much love, as much wisdom, as much Truth, as much about the faithfulness of God, as much time as we can.  Once kids enter the picture, our lives are no longer our own.  They are, but they aren't.  You parents know what I mean. 

We know some people who absolutely adore our children and are such a blessing in their lives.  They pray for them, they see the purpose of the Lord developing in them, and they find ways to speak life to them and enjoy them.  I am so grateful for those people!  They are true family, both natural and spiritual.  With our spiritual family here in Vermont, it's truly the body of Christ at work when I see those particular people acting on our kids' behalf out of a true love.  And that's how I feel about other kids in my life.  I see them, hoping to gain understanding of their ages and personalities, and I relish them and want to find ways to affirm them and bless them in the same way that others have for my kids.  Especially as someone with a ministry calling, I would be sort of an idiot if I didn't recognize the next generation bubbling over with life all around me, and the important and privileged role I have as an adult in their lives to make an impact. 

But at the same time, I know that kids are kids.  And with the case of my son, Levi, boys are boys!  Seeing them in their full "kidness" is something I now absolutely adore.  By the same token, I find more and more these days that I'm aware of anyone around me who would sneer their lips toward my kids or raise their eyebrows or ignore them or otherwise treat them like pariahs, just like my apostle was when his son was younger.  More and more, I understand what he meant.  You can indeed tell a lot about a person by the way he treats young children.  And the Mama Bear in me comes out when those who should know better take issue with children who are acting like, well, children. 

We're all on some part of the Learning Curve of Life, and we never peak or plateau.  But if we adults can't get past our personal preferences that don't make room for crazy childhood antics, the next generation could be in trouble.  Listen, most of you reading this know that I'm aaaall about discipline and training and having requirements.  I'm not talking about that.  I'm talking about when kids are just being kids, and some of them are more energetic than others.  Suck it up.  We're the grown-ups now.  So maybe we can lighten up!  Let kids be kids!  And have some grace for the parents around you who still haven't figured out how to be perfect and for the kids who are being nothing more than curious, boundary-pushing, bouncy balls of happy energy.  Something about loving one another, or something like that... 

And it might be imperative that we love the kids in our lives and sow into the next generation even if they do like to run and jump and shout and remind you that life can still be lively every once in a great while.

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